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This is a transcript of the Batman: The Animated Series episode "The Cat and the Claw Part I" from season one, which aired on September 5, 1992. It is divided into dialogue sections for better comprehension.

ENTER CATWOMAN

  • Catwoman: Now, Isis, my sweet. -- Perfect my love! Let's go home.
  • Batman: (from afar) So... our new cat burglar is a woman.
  • Catwoman: Hm... probably my imagination.
  • Batman: Probably not!
  • Catwoman: (Seeing Batman) Magnificent.
  • Batman: I suggest you save your flattery for the judge.
  • Catwoman: (after a short chase) So long Dark Knight!
  • Batman: Drop in anytime!
  • Catwoman: You're too kind!
  • Batman: (after Catwoman scratches his cape) Hey! I'll have to try and trim those claws!
  • Catwoman: (runs away and Isis is almost run over by a truck) NO!
  • Batman: (after saving Isis) Left you behind, did she? -- Thanks for the memento!

ENTER SELINA KYLE

  • Auctioneer: Next we'll be auctioning off the date with Gotham's most elegible bachelor, Mister Bruce Wayne. Ah, if Mr. Wayne would be good enough to step up? Now, now; don't be shy! Ah, there he is!
  • Girl #1: Oh, Bruce, I'm so happy to see you!
  • Girl #2: Where've you been?
  • Girl #3: You look wonderful!
  • Girl #4: Oh, have I missed you!
  • Girl #5: I've been pinching my pennies for you!
  • Bruce Wayne: Aahh-- excuse me ladies!
  • Auctioneer: Remember, we've got lots of animals to save, so we're going to start the bidding at five hundred dollars!
  • Girl #1: Five hundred!
  • Girl #2: Six hundred!
  • Auctioneer: We have six, do I hear seven?
  • Girl #3: Seven hundred!
  • Girl #4: Eight!
  • Girl #5: One thousand!
  • Auctioneer: Well, well; that's one thousand! Going once! Going twice!
  • Selina Kyle: Ten thousand dollars!
  • Auctioneer: D--d... do I hear any more bids? Then sold! For ten thousand dollars to Miss Selina Kyle!
  • Man #1: Oh, wow!
  • Bruce: I've never seen her before!
  • Man #2: Rumor has it, she is a wildlife nuts. She is supposed to be sponsoring a mountain lions reserve outside Gotham.
  • Bruce: It's a... pleasure!
  • Selina: Thank you!
  • Maven: (clears her throat)
  • Selina: Oh, Mr. Wayne, my secretary, Maven.
  • Bruce: How do you do? Ah... please, Bruce. I'm very flattered!
  • Selina: Please understand it's purely for the animals Mr. Wayne. You're off the hook.
  • Bruce: But you're not.
  • Selina: I beg your pardon?

BRUCE PAUSES AND BLUSHES

  • Bruce: You bought a date and I'm honor bound a-and delighted to deliver. I warn you, I'm not a man who gives up easily.
  • Selina: Alright, lunch then.

MACHINE GUN SHOTS ARE HEARD FROM OUTSIDE

  • Maven: I wonder what's going on?

SHE TURNS AROUND AND BRUCE IS GONE

  • Maven: Oh! Where'd he go?

TERROR IN GOTHAM

  • Commissioner Gordon: Watch yourselves men! This guys are crazy! -- Thanks friend!
  • Batman: What's going down?
  • Gordon: This morning I get a warning from the feds. Red Claw is in Gotham. Now this.
  • Batman: Any leads?
  • Gordon: Nothing. Red Claw is the most ruthless terrorist leader in the world. And we don't even got a picture of the guy.
  • Batman: I'll see what I can do from my end.
  • Gordon: Good. There's no telling what they're up to! Nothing is safe with this savages in town.

THE DATE...

  • Maven: Aren't you even a little excited about your date? I mean, Bruce Wayne is tall, dark and disgustingly rich!
  • Selina: I'd rather it were Batman. You should have seen him, Maven. He had the eyes of a lion.

THE BUZZER SOUNDS

  • Maven: Yes?
  • Doorman: A Mister Bruce Wayne is on his way up.
  • Selina: Here we go.
  • Maven: Come on, Selina. At least he's a good connection. You might be able to use him. (the phone rings) Hello?

THERE IS A KNOCK AT THE DOOR

  • Selina: Yes, I know. I suppose you're right. Still I wish it were Batman standing behind this door. Bruce, how wonderful to see you! Please, come in!
  • Bruce: You're even more stunning than I remember.
  • Selina: I'll just put these in some water.
  • Maven: Selina! It's your lawyer! He says the deal is off!
  • Selina: What! Give me that! Martin, what happened! - That's ridiculous! You tell him I wanna meet with him! - No, today! You can't sell to Multigon, we had an agreement!
  • Maven: Ah-- nice flowers!
  • Bruce: What's going on?
  • Maven: Selina was negotiating for land for wildlife preserve. Some cartel just muscled her out of the deal.
  • Selina: What? - What do you mean he won't take your calls? - You go there and kick down that door if yo have to! I want that land for the mountain lions! (Hangs the phone) Ohh. I'm afraid I'm not going to be very good company.
  • Bruce: Is there anything I can do?
  • Selina: Not really. Unless you can get me a meeting with the chairman of Multigon International.

BRUCE PICKS UP THE PHONE AND DIALS

  • Bruce: What time's good for you?
  • Selina: Hey, I'm starting to like this guy.

...AT MULTIGON

  • Mr. Stern: Really Wayne, I wish there was something I could do for you and your lovely friend, but the deal is quite set. -- You see, we're commited to building a major resort. Gold course, tennis course, ...ball. The whole shot.
  • Selina: That's insane! The land's in the middle of nowhere! It's worthless except to wildcats!
  • Stern: My dear, you just don't understand the .... and potential. As for the cats, Multigon will take care of them. One way or another. Now if you'll excuse me, I've given you all the time I can spare.
  • Selina: You'll find more time for me, Mr. Stern. Before I'm through I'll have every environmental group and animal rights activist breathing down your neck. They'll be looking at you and your project so closely, you'll feel like a bug in a bell-jar.

SELINA MARCHES OFF. BRUCE FOLLOWS HER AND WAVES TO STERN.

  • Bruce: Have a nice day!

STERN OPENS A SECRET DOOR AND...

  • Stern: I'm afraid that Selina Kyle may be trouble.
  • Red Claw: We've come too far to have out plans jeopardize by some environmental fanatic! Have someone keep an eye on Miss Kyle.

MEANWHILE BRUCE TAKES SELINA AWAY

  • Bruce: I'm afraid I wasn't much help after all.
  • Selina: Well at least now I now what their cover story is. -- You know, it's awfully late for lunch. Would you mind if I took a rain check on our date? Please.
  • Bruce: OK. Tomorrow?
  • Selina: Thanks! That'll give me time to take care of some business tonight!
  • Bruce: Actually, I'm planning to work late myself.

THE INVESTIGATIONS

  • Gang Leader: ...and so, boys. We gotta increase our cut in the gambling operation! Anybody got a problem with that?
  • Batman: Back off, boys! I want a word with your boss! But you can listen.
  • Gang Leader: What do you want?
  • Batman: What do you know about Red Claw?
  • Gang Leader: Why you askin' us? We're no terrorists!
  • Batman: You're still scum! And you hear things I don't! I want Red Claw! And until I get him, I'm going to lean extra hard on you and all the other mob bosses! If you think I've been bad news before...
  • Gang Leader: I- I get the picture! I'll see what I can do!

AT MULTIGON

  • Catwoman: If Stern won't admit what's going on, we'll have to find out for ourselves.
  • Red Claw: Despite our loss of arms, thank to Batman's interference. We're going to proceed according to plan. -- Tomorrow at 23 hundred hours, a train under military escort will pass through Gotham. It will be transporting a strain of viral plague that Interpol confistacted from out Eastern laboratories. I cannot overemphasize the importance of that plague to our cause.
  • Catwoman: All clear? -- I believe Beethoven's "Ode to Joy" will do the trick. Remind me to thank momma for the piano lessons! -- Outstanding!
  • Red Claw: We'll hit the train outside the city at this point!
  • Stern: What is that?
  • Red Claw: A cat at the end of its nine lives! Let's go!

THE ESCAPE

  • Catwoman: Alright! I'm done!
  • Red Claw: She's in the ventilation system!
  • Catwoman: I think we're in over our heads! - Detour!
  • Stern: She's down here! Hurry!
  • Catwoman: Going up! -- Hang on, Isis! - Isis, jump! (falls from rooftop and Batman saves her) My hero!

CATWOMAN KISSES BATMAN AND HE PULLS CATWOMAN AWAY FROM HER KISS

  • Catwoman: That was for saving my cat.
  • Batman: Is that all it was for?
  • Catwoman: Maybe not. . .
  • Batman: I heard gunfire!
  • Catwoman: Occupational hazard! (Batman tries to take her mask off) No! Let's keep the mystery.
  • Batman: If I wouldn't ask you, the police will!
  • Catwoman: Police? Don't be silly! You can't deny there's something between us.
  • Batman: You're right, and I'm afraid it's the law. I'm sorry
  • Catwoman: Never trifle with the affections of a woman. Until next time.
  • Batman: And there will be a next time.

SELINA RETURNS HOME

  • Maven: Oh, tough night?
  • Selina: Had its ups and downs, but I did get the pictures of the "fun, family resort site". It looks like there's some kind of abandoned military facility underground!
  • Maven: Very interesting!
  • Selina: We may save those mountain lions, yet!
  • Thug: But who's gonna save you?

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